Girl of the Month: Meet Dana Myers
This do-it-all wife and mom of two is the founder of the sexy lifestyle brand, Booty Parlor, author of The Mommy Mojo Makeover: 28 Tools to Reclaim Yourself and Reignite Your Relationship, and speaker and creator of the online course, The Satisfied Mama. If anyone knows the secret behind keeping it flirty and sexy, it's Dana Myers, who educates women on how sexy self-confidence can be transformed in the desire for life itself. Read more about our June Girl of the Month!
Please tell us what you do for a living.
I help women and mothers awaken their confidence and desire and create more satisfying, sexy lives. To break that down, I develop sensual wellness and beauty products through my sexy lifestyle brand Booty Parlor (which I run with my husband). As an author and a speaker, I share weekly content on my website and hold live workshops on the topics of self-love, sex and relationships after kids. And most excitingly, I’m launching my new online course business. My signature course, The Satisfied Mama, is launching this month - June, 2019.
It’s a tools-based course with 35+ video lessons and practices designed to empower mothers to reclaim themselves and reignite their relationship after kids.
Through video lessons and an online community, I walk mothers through the process of Loving their Body, Getting out of the “Mom Zone,” Awakening their Libido, Removing the Resentment, Reviving the Romance and Reigniting their Sex Life. This program is really the culmination of the last 15 years of my experience as a sex & relationships expert/author and the last 8 as a busy mother.
How did you get started with your career?
The short version is that I’ve just always been passionate about “all things beauty” and “all things sexy.” While my career started in the music business, those passions (and my partnership with Charlie) guided me to create a brand for women who wanted beautiful products that inspired them to feel sexier and more confident. We started Booty Parlor in 2005, I released my first book in 2010, my second book in 2019. Along the way, I’ve done hundreds of private workshops for women who want to feel more sensually and sexually empowered. Every day, I get to do what I love. While there are always challenges in business, the fact that I get to inspire and empower other women simply by doing what I love makes work feel like a dream.
Describe a day in Dana’s life. While each day is somewhat different, each day is a dance between mom-life, entrepreneur-life, nurturing my relationship, and nurturing myself. Sort of looks like this:
Wake up & get the kids ready for school.
Work out + Coffee + Late Breakfast
WORK! (Writing & shooting videos, nurturing partnerships, online marketing, product development, meetings/ talking with team).
KID-TIME (this means cook + play + homework + the bedtime routine)
OR, at least once a week I take a MOMMY POP-OUT with a girlfriend. We’ll head out for a drink, a laugh, a show, an event, a dance class… anything but the routine of putting the kids to bed!
UNWIND: At night, once the kids are in bed, my honey and I will enjoy a late dinner and a tv show, or we’ll plan travel together, or catch up on work, or spend time on our own to refresh ourselves after a busy day.
SLEEP: I don’t get enough. I’m usually asleep by midnight and back at it at 6am!
How do you find time to do it all—family, work, fun, etc?
I’m super strict with my scheduling! Every Sunday night, I look at my week overview and sketch out the big things I want to accomplish, both professionally and personally (and that includes date nights & intimacy, too). Then, every morning, I sit with my Panda Planner and map out exactly what I’m doing that day, hour by hour, and most importantly, what my priorities are. If I get to/through my top 3 priorities, I’ll feel like I had a productive day.
While I often crave more unstructured time, my life requires me to be VERY strict with my schedule. If I want it all, and I do -- the me-time, the career, the mom life, the social life, the romance with my husband, the travel, the self-care — then I have to plan for it.
That means I know exactly what I’m doing every single day, down to what video I’m writing, what self-care I’m practicing, what domestic duties I’m taking care of, what conference calls I’m leading, what family-life tasks I need to accomplish. I write it ALL down in the planner and then I keep detailed/expanded notes in a separate notebook. It’s crazy, but true: my notebooks have notebooks. The planning itself takes quite a bit of time, but it’s worth it because I wind up feeling very proud of how productive I am. I do have a goal of carving out ONE FULL DAY of unstructured time for myself each week, where I can be freer to have lunch with friends, explore the city, and just let the day unfold. It’s a goal for 2019!
Tell us about “Mommy Mojo”.
Mojo is best defined as the feminine sexual spark that lies within every woman—it’s a glow from the inside out. Mojo is your lust for life, love, sex, pleasure, and all the juicy possibilities that are available to all of us. It is your sex—your sexual attitude, your sexual drive, your personal sexual magnetism, and a reflection of how confident and free you feel to express yourself sexually.
Mommy Mojo is more than just confidence, it’s sexy self-confidence integrated with the rich wisdom and experience of motherhood. It’s a mother’s ability to know, embrace, and love her post-baby body, to know her desires and feel empowered to communicate them, and to confidently prioritize herself, her sensual satisfaction, and her intimate relationship with her partner—just as much as she prioritizes her own children and well-being.
Embracing your Mommy Mojo is about choosing love over resentment, sexiness over sexlessness, and self-care over self-neglect. It’s about choosing to be sexually expressive instead of shut down. It’s a long definition -- but it all means something to me!
What’s your favorite “date night” restaurant in Miami?
We don’t have that ONE “date night” spot we hit up all the time, but we absolutely LOVE Bar Meli for it’s relaxed vibe, ample wine pours and yummy lamb-chops and grilled halloumi!
Describe the perfect date night for you.
Anything my husband plans! Charlie is always buying tickets to cool shows and events, unique performances or activations, and booking little getaways. I think he realized that, after we had kids, I needed that kind of inspiration more than ever. I needed to get out and see the world as a woman, be immersed in culture, be stimulated and excited… because that’s what brings out my FUN, FEMININE side. So, he’s a dream like that - he’s always got something fun up his sleeve to take me to. In recent months, my favorite dates were this Game of Thrones experience with a full orchestra, amazing seats to see the rock band Muse, and a sexy overnight at The Edition. (Thank you, thank you Charlie! You’re my hero!)
Where are you from and how long have you lived in Miami?
I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago, and then lived in the city when I studied music at DePaul University. At 21, I moved to Manhattan to earn my Master’s at NYU. After 9/11, I spent a decade in LA where I met Charlie and started Booty Parlor together, and where we had our first child. Then we moved to Brooklyn and had our 2nd child. After that, we moved to St. Lucia for another few years, until finally, we wound up in Miami. We’ve been here for a full two years now. I hope to stay a while!
Can’t leave the house without? Between April and October I don’t leave the house without my handheld fan. If you ever seen me out, you’ve probably seen me clutching onto it for dear life. I naturally run very hot and it can cause me to feel very uncomfortable in the Miami heat. So I never leave home without my little pink, 3-speed fan. It helps me handle the insane temperatures and humidity and still feel confident. This summer, I’ll be trying out the gift I received (ok, asked for) for Mother’s Day. It’s called EMBR Wave and it’s a device you wear on your wrist to help regulate your temperature. My fingers are crossed it’ll be a revelation in cooling me down…
100% it’s WINTER, for reasons stated above!
Best way to decompress at home. Every night, I lay my mat down and stretch. I always decompress my spine on my yoga wheel and really roll out my back first. Then, I just flow it out listening to music on Spotify, or if I’m feeling lazy, just do deep stretches on the floor while half-watching something on TV! Throughout the day, I’ll dance in the mirror in between meetings or projects to release emotions, shift energy and re-energize myself. At night, I’m also a fan of a glass of wine with a yummy dinner, or a sip of honey whiskey on ice and some dark chocolate — all that feels like decompressing, too!
Favorite scent. Parvati by The Goddess Line. It’s super simple, sweet and sensual. Just notes of vanilla mixed with sweet almond oil. It’s the only thing I wear. And if I think about it, vanilla-scented oil is the only thing I’ve ever worn. I’m super sensitive to fragrance -- anything too floral or woody makes me feel allergic and irritated!
What’s on your reading list. Unfortunately, nothing active right now. I have a massive stack of books on my nightstand, and not one of them is getting my attention!
How do you usually start your mornings? All my mornings start with being woken up by my little human alarm clocks between 6am - 6:30. (It’s weird/awful to be at a stage in life where “sleeping in” means 7am.) After some snuggling with the kids, I jump out of bed, throw on my workout clothes and head out to the gym for a 7:30 workout. My slower morning rituals happen after that. Around 10am, I prepare my "butter coffee" recipe in the blender (3 shots espresso + a bit of hot water + grass-fed butter + vanilla MCT oil + dash of stevia = HEAVEN). Then I putter around for a bit: seeking inspiration in books, journaling, chatting with a friend or my mom, playing the piano for a few minutes, and thinking about the work I have ahead of me. Around 11am, I prepare my first meal and start my workday.
What is the first thing you thought of this morning?
Today, I woke up and immediately thought “Don’t pick up your phone!”
Instead, I put my hands on my heart and started a gratitude practice for all the love, health, opportunity and abundance we have in our life.
What’s your go-to fitness routine or regimen?
Right now, I go to F45 functional training classes two-to-three times a week. They’re just 45 minutes (which is the perfect amount of time for my busy mama schedule) and it’s super close to my house. I usually do one cardio + two lifting/resistance classes each week. (Getting there for the 7:30 means my kids get to wave to me from the car on Biscayne when they see me through the window. This makes me feel proud they see me prioritizing my health first thing in the morning, even though it means our amazing nanny drives them to school instead of me). It’d be easy to feel guilty that I don’t drive them to school, but I try to steer clear of that. I know that because I get my workout in early, I can get my work done on time, and then be there for them for family dinners and nighttime fun.
Where do you work out/practice and why do you go there? While I love F45, I’m a yogi through and through and feel most at home at SOL YOGA. (Hot Yoga is my favorite, because of the warmth your body feels + the focus it requires to stay with your breath). For me, it’s moving meditation. Sol Yoga just has the best infrared heaters, it’s impeccably clean, the vibes are super good, and the teachers are amazing. That said, right now I’m making it to class only 1x/week, simply because I’m in “launch mode” on a new project and yoga class requires a full two hours out of my day. Additionally, I walk around my neighborhood almost every day - either with my kids on a post-dinner stroll or on my own, mid-day, to clear my mind.
What is your approach to nutrition? I’m a “feel good girl” and have never been a fan of dieting or following any strict approach to nutrition. Mostly, I’ve always just eaten healthy as a way of life, while also indulging when I feel like it. That said, after having two children and living in St. Lucia (where there’s less access to easy-to-grab prepared health foods), I gained a lot of weight. I thought it would just “melt off” when we moved to Miami and when it didn’t, I felt unhappy about my body. So, for the last 9 months I’ve adopted a low-carb or “keto-lite” lifestyle and have dropped about 15 pounds. I do it my own way, and definitely with a heavy emphasis on veggies. I go through cauliflower rice, spaghetti squash and zucchini noodles like nobody’s business, with lots of healthy fats and moderate proteins. And always, always, ALWAYS chocolate. I currently feel amazing in my body and have very steady energy eating this way.
What are your lifestyle “must-do’s” and your absolute “no ways”?
My must-dos are:
- Seeking out as much fun as possible in any given situation
- Having Frequent Orgasms
- Practicing Open Communication
- Finding Gratitude & Humor
- Eating Chocolate
My “No way” is smoking cigarettes or having nicotine again, in any form. I picked up that habit in college and held onto it through much of my twenties. It was a hard habit to kick, and now that I’m over it, I’m OVER it.
What’s your “passed down from Mom” beauty secret? My mom is a make-up artist and I grew up watching her transform women in the beauty salon where she had her studio. So, choosing one beauty secret from her is like choosing one hit from The Rolling Stones. That said, I’ll have to say WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS, WEAR BLUSH. You know, you can wake up feeling like a troll, but you pop a little pink on your cheeks and, poof, you look alive again. Blush is my magic, and I’m forever putting on more and more. For me, it’s the secret to looking youthful and vital and flushed, like I’ve just had a Big O ;)
Best beauty tip you ever received.
SEEK OUT NATURAL LIGHT AND BLEND! (And then, blend some more). Checking your make-up in natural light is key or catching streaks and blotches that need, you guessed it, more blending. My mama taught me this one too. Oh, and keep a tweezer in your purse. You never know when you might need it.
What’s a beauty secret you want to share with us.
Did I mention that blush gives you that “just-had-an-O” glow? So, wear some! And the most obvious ‘not-so-secret secret’ is just to stay out of the sun. I’m like a vampire in that way; with my fair skin, I feel like I’m melting/dying when I’m direct sun. I literally feel like I’m burning- it’s not nice. As a result, I’ve never sat in the sun to get a tan and I think my skin is holding up pretty good because of it. My mother stayed out of the sun too, she’s 73 now and looks AMAZING.
What’s your philosophy about beauty.
For me, make-up is my the “visual art” I’m good at. I can’t draw, but I can paint my face! I love how it makes me look—but even more so, I love how it makes me feel: like a beautiful, confident, sexy, and put-together mama ready for anything. Makeup is most definitely my mood-lifter, especially when I’ve run myself into the ground and all I want to do is climb back into bed—it’s my secret weapon that instantly gives me a boost of feminine confidence. As well, I like to bring a sense of ritual to my beauty routine: in particular, I combine sexy, self-love affirmations and empowering thoughts as I look into my own eyes and apply my face. This practice effectively transforms a mundane makeup routine into something far more special: a soulful experience that’s meaningful to my mojo: my sensuality, confidence, and creativity. And THAT’s my philosophy on beauty!
Favorite app. I love the NY Times app. I avoid the news on television but like to read the Times Top Stories digest at night to make sure I keep up with what’s happening in the country and the world. Plus, I love the mini crossword puzzle. It sort of clears my mind right before bed. That said, I will often skip the articles that feel too intense or depressing — those keep me up instead of help me wind down!
Favorite social-media platform. Instagram. I love the creativity, visual beauty and self-expression on the app, but I will admit that I can get lost in “the scroll” and feel myself sliding into the comparison trap. When I feel that way, I recognize it and reduce my usage. But, I LOVE how great IG is for meeting new people to connect and collaborate with. I use it for business way more than I ever used LinkedIN.
Favorite person to follow on Instagram.
I don’t have a favorite person, per se, but of course, I really admire you Gigi and what you’ve created with DeLaHeart! In all seriousness, I love your honesty, consistency and the value you offer your readers. Plus, you’re my neighbor and I love your doggies.
Last google search. Ohhhh no. You don’t want to know my last search. It was about a gross thing you deal with as a parent, and I’ll spare you all the details! ;)
Person you text the most. It’s my best friend, Lauren. She and I met in our early twenties at a cafe in Union Square, NYC, and both wound up in Miami 20 years later. We have such a long history and deep understanding of one another’s lives, feelings and humor. We make each other laugh over text every single day. (If you’re reading this, I LOVE YOU, LAUREN!)
FASHION & LIFESTYLE
What’s your favorite city in the world. My initial response would be Los Angeles, because it’s the place where I feel the most "at home." But right now, I want to give London some BIG LOVE. It’s where my husband is from and we spend a fair amount of time there every year. It feels like a more liveable city than New York, and I have so much fun immersing myself in the culture while we’re there. We go to the theater, see edgy cabaret, go to the museums, walk the parks. I love to explore all the hot yoga places, and their drugstores, too (they’re WAY more amazing than ours). I love connecting with our relatives and feeling a part of something bigger than our little nuclear family here in Miami. Plus, one of my BEST friends from LA lives there now - so I adore seeing her, drinking cocktails, take pedi-cab rides, and laughing my face off with her. Much like Los Angeles, I just have this sense of feeling at home in London.
Where do you want to travel next. Italy. This summer, we are going to Rome, Pompeii, Amalfi, Puglia and who knows where else. Should be a blast. I’m also REALLY curious to go spend a few months in Bali and see what life is like there.
Last trip you took. My husband and I took a kid-free weekend to New Orleans in the days building up to Mardi Gras. It was a full-blown party in the streets from the moment we landed until the moment we left. It was AMAZING to dive into a culture and a party-vibe so fully. That said, it took about a week to recover though…
What words do you live by.
In a relationship, I live by this: LOVE CONQUERS ALL. LOVE is the force that keeps everything together when everything else feels like it’s becoming a hot mess! That, and the idea of "FIGHT FAST + FORGIVE FAST.” To me this is golden. I can’t stand to stay in a fight with my husband - so we fight fast, talk it out, and move to forgiveness quickly.
In business, I am TRYING to live by this: DONE IS BETTER THAN PERFECT. I have made many mistakes in business by trying to get something PERFECT before I release it into the world. It’s slowed me down. Now, I’m trying to adopt the idea that ‘done is better than perfect’—you know, get things out quicker and and then go back and fix if needed!
As a woman, my mantra is this: I am calm. I am capable. I am confident. And I’m F*CKING HOT. I have recited this to myself countless times before speaking engagements, as I prepared to give birth, before climbing a mountain in St. Lucia -- really, it’s my go-to mantra anytime I need to ramp up my confidence and make the magic happen for myself.
How do you describe your personal style.
Part 80s, Part Hippie, Part Mom Uniform.
If your kids had to describe you in one word, what would it be?
I asked them, and here’s what they both said: “You’re MOM!”
They know I’m so much more than their mama - they’re always asking me about my work projects, and they’re proud of me in that way. But, truth be told, I’m happy that MOM is the first word that came to their minds. I always want to be their mama, their safe space, their rock, the home base they can always find.
If you could offer dating advise to your 18 year old self, what would it be?
If the relationship isn’t right, right away, MOVE ON!
I know this sounds very black & white, because sometimes relationships DO work out after a break-up, or two. However, I just believe that GREAT love should feel REALLY EASY at its core. Of course, you’ll have to work and continue investing in your relationship forever, but the EASE should be there from the very beginning. Not games, struggle or drama. All of that makes for good, angsty poetry, but not for solid, long-lasting, empowering love.
What’s the secret to a healthy and sexy marriage?
Ha! All my secrets are in my latest book, so you’ll have to read it ;)
Of course, it’s a combination of things, great communication being the first. If I have to choose one “secret,” it’s PRIORITIZING YOUR SEX LIFE. On a practical level, what that means for me is working as a team with my husband to make sure we connect intimately 2-3 times each week, in a HIGH QUALITY way. Doesn’t mean that every time we make love it’s a big production, but it does mean that there is thought that goes into it. When will we have it? How will we have it? What erotic energies will we explore? And on a practical level, how will we make sure we get the kid-free time for that to happen? Some people feel that “planning sex” is a bummer, but I say it makes intimacy an exciting event. One where you can plan and anticipate all sorts of things -- what you’ll wear, what will excite you, what you’ll do, how you’ll feel, what new ideas you can bring to the table. Also, when you bring this kind of excitement AND consistency to your love life, it provides a platform for you & your partner to get really creative and seek out new experiences to try together. Prioritizing your sex life means you always keep your eye on the prize: a continuously reignited chemistry and freshly inspired sense of sexual intimacy and satisfaction. But don’t think this comes easily! This is a commitment and it takes practice, in the same way that pursuing your fitness or nutrition goals does. But there’s no question the effort is worth it… because it equals MORE PLEASURE and a TRULY HEALTHY MARRIAGE!