Happy Valentine’s Day everybody! Today is certainly a happy occasion for many—an opportunity to spend the day with your significant other, show your love, feel loved, and to unapologetically eat tons of sugar. But for others, this Hallmark holiday can actually cause anxiety, depression, stress, and unhappiness. And because I have been on both sides of the spectrum, I thought I’d share my own little story on love and the holiday. If you’re single or in the wrong relationship, my journey should help you regain faith in love and trust that “the one" is out there and that the Universe will conspire so you can find each other when the time is right. Cliché, but in my case, a true story.
Four years ago, on Valentine’s Day, I called off my engagement of one year to a great guy I had dated on and off for a few years. I remember that morning as one of the “Aha! moments” of my life—a moment where I got very clear and honest with myself to realize that even though this guy was great, he was not great for me, and we were definitelly not great together.
Going through the saddest messiest breakup in the history of my life during Valentine’s Day was très depressing. I remember going through my instagram and wanting to choke cupid as I scrolled through everyone’s pictures of red roses, chocolates, romantic trips, and thoughtful surprises. I mean, I was supposed to be getting married in a month and instead I was packing my stuff to move out and move on. WTF! Hands down, worse Valentine's Day ever.
A few days later, I received an unexpected phone call from a fun, handsome guy I had dated exactly a year ago during one of the “off” times of my previous relationship. Saying he had “heard” what happened and was wondering if I was okay. How sweet! We started texting and talking, and the more we talked, the more I realized I had a lot of cleaning up to do before I could even entertain the idea of a new relationship. I also learned that he was in a sticky romantic situation himself…so I decided to take a step back, focus on myself, heal, reset and let the Universe sort everything else out.
A couple of months went by and this guy reappeared. This time with a relentless “she’s not getting away this time” attitude, which I was into. At that point I had gone through so much, I wasn’t playing games with anybody. I went through major healing and life resetting which put me in a much better place too. We started talking again and we went on a date and another one and another one and next thing I knew I was engaged 6 months later! This "fun handsome guy" is the love of my life, my husband, and baby daddy.
This story is not about the “happily ever after”. It’s about not letting the noise get to you, whether it is a holiday, society, or even that mean little voice inside of you. This story is about trusting and trusting that the Universe is carrying you to the place you need to get to, and that sometimes all we have to do is surrender to its power by loving ourselves first.